Posts Categorized: Shop Talk

June 18, 2013

“Love What You Got”

This is an awesome video all around, but Lady Ross hit it on the head when she implored us all to really just accept & love the hair that we already have.

That is all you must do to love. Accept all of you.

And if you’re asking that quiet question of, “well, how do I do that?!” The answer is simpler than you thought. You must choose to love.

Now it may not come right away, but it begins with the commitment to follow the journey to exploring & discovering the many facets of your hair. But you have to do the work.

& along the way, what you will discover is something so much more than hair innuendoes and compliments. Eventually, you discover a part of you that was meant to be uncovered & untwisted & revealed for not just the world to admire; but for you to cherish as wholly you. Begin to accept the grime & dirt & good as what they are, a part of you.

In it’s purest form, this is all quite relative – and depending on the conversation, we just may all agree that ‘hair is just hair,’ but over the years I’ve quietly learned to discard that argument. Since putting my heart and the care of my hands into nurturing my FRO, I know that what I have today is a relationship that is rooted in love. No doubts there. And it’s been my experience thus far that there simply is no fairness in limiting my experiences over the years to ‘just‘ moments. I can never ‘just‘ love my hair. I go in.

I do secretly have this great wish that we may, at some point or another – all come to this empathic understanding – a moment where all that our hair is to the world is something that is uniquely a part of us, belongs to us, can only be defined by a sole undeniable truth. A truth that can never falter bend or break when presented with another person’s reproach or dismay at what our hair means, sounds or looks to them.

But until then, I have chosen to love without abandon.

As of today, what I know of my Fro is this: It is ever-changing. Stubborn. Soft-hearted. Has a quiet ego. Loved.

How about you…what’s to love about your hair?

May 8, 2013

Mum

cha cha & mom

Today, while putting together arrangements for a special Mother’s Day treat at work, I realized just how fast the day is approaching!  It really is one of those holidays that creep up so quickly, that I often end up racking my brain to find something special to send to my own Mum. Something undeniably her, that it’d end up putting a smile on her face & score me major points in the daughter of the year category. A few years ago I was at my best when I scrambled together an album/scrapbook filled with pictures and memories of her life before marrying my Dad. It was something I had built, and cut and glued and sweated over for days and once done hated parting with.

This year, while I do have a long list of possible gifts and special perfumes and gadgets I could pack away in a box and ship away; nothing appears to be measuring up. This round, I’m blaming it on age. Age & time are mimicking whispers & advising me to replace these things with declarations on gratitude and appreciating the very presence of a person; of family above all else money can buy. And in this case, my Mum…the gratitude of having her in my life is immeasurable. How do you package and ship this?

I’ve talked about Mum before on this blog, and thanks to this book you can read a bit more about our sordid history on FRO and acceptance. But this past weekend as I sought a way to deal with an emergency that was so beyond my reach that it was literally thousands of miles away in a hospital room, and no amount of cell phone calls and long talks with that spiritual compas could calm unspoken fears; I  needed a way to express that gratitude beyond just words.

& because Mother’s Day is this very Sunday, I thought I’d give it a shot.

Any mommies or devoted daughters out there? what are you doing to celebrate?

November 4, 2011

Happy Weekend!

First things first….{{hugs}} to all of you who have welcomed me back into the blogging sphere. It was an unusually long sabbatical…a very necessary one, but still bittersweet after running into a few of life’s inevitable obstacles. Several twitter friends & readers began to voice their concern a while back forcing me to wipe the haze from tired eyes and  just jump back on the horse. Which can often be tough when you’re in the midst of discovering & breathing in a few new experiences….like Yoga!

Earlier this summer a friend & I took the plunge after signing up for a few Groupon deals, and hit up a Yoga Studio here in the city. My first Yoga experience…and it felt…still feels sacred. After receiving a small health scare from the Doctor during my last checkup, incorporating another form of physical activity into the daily routine was a definite priority. Honestly, within as little as two sessions with some incredible instructors, a few dozen dormant muscles were rising up to say their Hellos!

Apart from now greeting the day with sun salutations, I was able to attend my first blogging conference in D.C. along with a few hundred social media lovelies that stole my heart. See…normally I am a very reserved person, nestled in a cafe between a book and coffee is where you’d often find me, so embarking on a trip to D.C. with prospects of networking and forming new relationships was a bit daunting….yet it was very well worth the trip. Blogalicous weekend sought out to celebrate the growing diversity in the blogging/social sphere & to be a part of such an important cause was inspiring and heartening. I left D.C. fully motivated but most importantly grateful for the opportunity. There is just SO much to see & do in D.C., that a short weekend hauled up in a hotel just wouldn’t cut it, so plans to return are definitely in the works.

If you guys are still reading this in a reader, hop on over for a quick bit & wave hello to the new design! Finally, the majority of the kinks have been worked out thanks to the design hand of Yellow & Savvy Design. It’s exciting to be starting semi-fresh, especially with the new year/b-day fast approaching. There are a few new elements I’d love to incorporate to B2C going forward, all of which will be slowly added in the upcoming weeks:).

In the meantime…thank you ALL for the continued support & while you’re out enjoying the Fall weekend (don’t forget to set your clocks back one hour! more Zzzzzzz….) head on over to iTunes for a quick listen of Lianne La Havas’s new EP “Lost & Found.” I was first introduced to her sound earlier in the Summer & even mentioned her briefly on the blog, so happy to see her dropping an album.

Have a great weekend!

August 12, 2011

Seeing Your Hair Through New Eyes…

A few weeks ago I stood in front of my mother’s mirror while visiting her home in Florida, prepping my twists into a pinned up style when she quietly stood next to her sink. She waited as I pushed the last pin into place before asking if I would untwist her strands and fix her fro. Her vanity mirror is quite large, yet my place has always been by the crux of her hip, ready to nudge with an elbow if the urge hit, and because we were talking hair, I inched in a bit closer.

My mother and I have shared numerous rituals over the years that span from heated moments in the kitchen, to hours on the phone gabbing about The Bachelorette. Yet this moment felt different, because she was different. We both stood side by side, still gabbing as I helped fluff her fro, deciding on which new moisturizer to sample, as compared to the last visit where both my father & I counted the minutes on the clock as she pressed her thinning strands with an electric hot comb. On this trip I noticed her desire to want to push past old insecurities which often forced her to mask her kinks with hats & heat.

I understood that after six years of being natural, from the flat ironing, to the redundant texturizers and hot comb sessions, that she was finally able to see her hair through new eyes. She smiled more, slowly became enamored as I paid special care to each coil, and was able to share her joy with me. Aside from accepting her happiness for what it was & encouraging her to further experiment and practice…and, well all the things a ‘good natural’ ought do, I felt proud.

Of course, there are times where I would happily argue about the importance of regarding hair as ‘just hair,’ yet when it comes to my Mum, her happiness and her newfound courage to rock her natural, there is greater power in the actual choice we make to be & stay natural. This is what I’ve come to admire.  Many of us do experience personal growth in ways we were never able to realize. There is strength to be found in making a choice that resonates at the core of who we strive to become.

Protect your beliefs, your ideals and your reasons for going natural by reinforcing them. If you are afraid to take that leap and let the world see you, the real you….do it anyway.  The understanding of course is that it will be difficult. You have emotional hurdles to measure up to and ideals to overcome. But remember to do it anyway. If time is what you need, take it before it runs out. If it’s fear that is holding you back, walk through it…if not once, twice…three times, but it’s important to keep walking with a goal in mind, and that is to visibly see yourself through your eyes, no one else’s.

June 21, 2011

Fill Me In!

Just got back from a short trip to Florida visiting the Fam & currently sorting through a ton of pics and topics to post on the blog. It’s been a while since I had the chance to mentally detox from the hustle & bustle everyday-ness of NYC, so while the visit was short with the folks, I thoroughly enjoyed basking in the sun, walking along the sandy beach….and just breathing a ton easier.

Summer is indeed here!! I’m much excited to plan out a few outdoor picnics, attend more than a few FREE outdoor concerts & simply enjoy these short weeks of beautiful weather. Posting might be slightly spotty in these parts for a while (no worries…). I’ve been considering a slight sprucing up of the blog recently & feel Summer is the ideal time to take on that task. I’m still very much in love with the current layout, but deep down am a creature that thrives on change & seeing things through newer eyes.

& with that said, I would love your input on what you would like to see here on Back To Curly! I’ve already got a few things lined up as far as introducing you guys to a few new brands, but think it’s time to hear from YOU! If you’d like to see interviews, more product reviews, beauty pieces (short/long), tutorials, hair stories, inspirational pieces…let me know! Drop a comment down below and fill me in on what inspires you, what you’d love to see more of. You can also send me a note & we chat it up (chai@backtocurly.com).

:Happy Summer Solstice:

June 2, 2011

On the Fast Track to the Hair You Want

Alright, so this might be a bit misleading. There is no fast way to achieve the hair you want, in fact if you hear someone mention this in hearsay somewhere along your natural journey, politely nod and move on. Instead, what you should uncover are the tools you need along your journey to help ease the frustrations, platitudes and welcome the inevitable successes.

I was natural for a little over 7 years before finally deciding to stand up straight, take accountability for how I was treating my hair, as opposed to just ‘dealing’ with it. What’s the difference? Well, before you give me the *side eye* and tell me there isn’t…hear me out.

Dealing vs. Caring

I’m a stickler for language and using words to encourage and uplift those in the natural journey, which is why I often abhor the use of the word ‘deal’. To just deal with your natural hair means you’re inevitably missing out on the many perks other naturals are experiencing with their Fro’s. Trust me, many aren’t just ‘dealing.’ Granted it takes time, but eventually many do get over the hurdles and begin to value their hair in a way that doesn’t feel overly bothersome or much like a burden.

The art of caring for your natural hair often requires a few trustworthy glances in the mirror, and the ability to be open & honest. Are you doing this for yourself? If so, silence the critics, all the doubts & fears and start an inner dialog. Changing your mindset and approach to how you treat your hair should be a pretty high priority before inspecting the aisles of the local beauty store. Don’t just ‘DO’ your hair, learn to understand why it behaves the way it does, why it might need a bit more TLC than the next natural, and realize there’s nothing more rewarding than when you put in the work  & care for something of value.

Be Your Hair’s #1 Fan

One of the many advantages of wearing natural hair today is the ability to stand out. Even with more and more women picking up the sheers and doing the BIG CHOP, no matter the party or event a woman who proudly rocks her natural hair is able to light up a room. The easiest way to grab a hold of that light, is to be your hair’s #1 Fan. Above all the compliments, encouraging nods & even sideway glances, you must value your ‘different’ more than the next person. To be validated by loved ones & friends is a wonderful blessing, but to love your inner beauty,  to know for certain “I steer this ship,” and no one else…is when you’re in full control of your journey. To own it, you have to love it.

So to get on the fast track to the hair you want, you have to KNOW what you want. Set things in motion, do the work & commit to a game plan. The end rewards far outweigh any current struggles you may be facing or many of the emotional hurdles you might have to overcome. The fast track to any success story is to remain mindful, open and willing to learn.